So, after the compulsory Christmas over-indulgence, it’s time for a New Year change. No more Ferrero Rocher for breakfast, Bucks Fizz at 10am or evenings snacking on crackers and cheese. No more staying with family and friends, being offered cups of tea all day long, meals appearing out of nowhere and dishes miraculously cleaning themselves. Now it’s back to grocery shopping, cooking, washing-up, cleaning and hoovering. What could possibly be depressing about that?
New Year’s Resolutions:
Spend less time on the computer. I had a total break from email, blogs and the internet over Christmas, which was actually very relaxing and I’ve got to admit that I kinda didn’t miss it too much.
Spend more time writing novel.
Get fit/lose weight (got to have that one, it’s been on the list since 1989).
Be more positive.
Unfortunately, I’m going to break the last resolution immediately with a grouchy post about some of the annoying phrases that drive me bonkers.
Me Time – I’ve already mentioned this one but I don’t think it can be over emphasized how irritating it is; what’s wrong with just having some time?
Touch base/think outside the box/take it to the next level/blue-sky thinking – these were spouted all the time when I worked in marketing. That might help explain why I hated 93% of the people there. I refused to use any of them. Could that also help to explain why I was made redundant? Twice. From the same company.
Reach out – as a synonym for making contact, eg ‘Please reach out if you need assistance.’ This is the favourite expression of HWW’s American employer. Reading it ten times a day in emails is actually causing him to develop premature frown lines and a nervous twitch.
Happy dance – as in, ‘I just got a free muffin in Starbucks…happy dance!’ Really?
Calm down – my rage rises in direct proportion to the amount of times this is said to me.
It is what is it/it’s meant to be – why? Says who?
I wear many different hats in my daily life – I actually saw this on a CV, which went straight in the bin. Obviously.
I always give 110% – no, you don’t. You cannot give more than 100%. EVER. And who gives 100% all the time anyway? Certainly not at work. Another CV favourite.
Mumpreneur – ever heard of a Dadpreneur? (Thanks to angels&urchins for that one)
I’m not being funny but… – I’m about to make a really bitchy comment.
Cheer up, it might never happen – how do you know??
Plus several others that I can’t list here because they are used on a daily basis by close friends and family… And now that I’ve got all that off my chest, I will (try to) be positive for the rest of 2014.
Any expressions that irritate you so much that you want to slap the user in the face with a damp dishcloth?
BARBED WORDS 